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KKLive: Trendasaurus Gets All New TRIGGER WARNINGS, Nightclubs Are Dying & More

There’s been a lot of talk about trigger warnings and safe spaces lately. Some people are against them, while others feel they’re needed to make sure those who have been through trauma are comfortable. More and more universities are asking their professors to issue trigger warnings before discussions of sensitive material, and now it has quickly bled into the social media world. Instagram and Facebook have just launched a new feature where you can filter your feed to make sure there is nothing that will trigger you to get angry or depressed. In other words, the reach on our Facebook posts just got a lot shorter. And that’s tough for us as a growing show. So after talking about this at length, we have decided to issue trigger warnings before talking about things that might be sensitive for our listeners. We figure CBS is going to do this to us anyway, so we might as well start now. So here we go. TRIGGER WARNING!!!! The following Trendasaurus could be seen as offensive to anyone who is vegan, vegetarian, pesceterian, gluten-free, dairy-free, celibate, anyone who likes Netflix, pop music, dub step, alcohol, fedoras, and anyone who can’t afford rent in the Bay Area.*

It seems in this day and age that people just don’t pop bottles in the club like they used to. Things that were once so much fun that they were worth rapping about are just not as appealing anymore. With the coming of the  hipster movement, you see more and more  people going to dive bars and doing shots of Fernet on a Friday night rather than enjoying some Cris at a nightclub. Recent data has shown that in 2016, the nightclub could be dying. In some other parts of the world, nightclubs are shutting down left and right. In London for example, 1000 nightclubs have shut down in the last decade. And why? Some think it’s because people just don’t do drugs as much as they used to. And with studies saying that younger generations hate drinking and sex, why would they want to go to a club when they can stay at home, watch Netflix and NOT chill? It does sound appealing, but is this the end of the nightclub, or will sick beats give it the comeback that it needs? Also, in case it wasn’t apparent by now, I am white.

Night Clubs Are Dying Off In Europe, Due To A Few Fascinating Factors

There has been a lot of talk in the past couple days about overheating and pneumonia when it comes to Hillary Clinton. But the hashtag #HillarysBodyDouble really came out of left field. The whole idea that Clinton has a paid body double has been swarming all over social media. It’s a conspiracy theory that no one would have given two craps about a year ago, but look at us now! Has there been a Hillary Clinton impersonator walking around all this time, making appearances and getting into vans and wobbling around, and getting paid for it all the while?? Many people who support this theory have been comparing pictures, pointing out that the differences mainly lie in the cheekbones and in the smooth vs wrinkled skin.

As the Bay Area gets more and more expensive, we see more and more famous houses hitting the market, trying to get in on all the action. Just this year the Ghiradelli Mansion, the Full House House, and perhaps the most famous Whoopi Goldburg house in Berkeley have all been bought and sold. And whoever drafted the Mrs. Doubtfire House in our Bay Area fantasy draft has some points coming their way because that house is hitting the market. It hasn’t officially been listed yet, so we don’t know the current asking price, but whatever it is I’m sure it’s out of your budget. The last time it was sold was in 1997 for 1.4 million dollars, so you can imagine 20 years later it will be worth a lot more. But if you want this place you’ll have to accept all the action that comes with it. It was basically turned into a memorial shrine when Robin Williams died, and then of course there was the lady who tried to set fire to it not too long ago. But isn’t that all worth it to walk through the halls that Robin Williams vacuumed while dressed in drag? I should think so.

Everyone’s talking about self-driving cars, but there are very few people talking about self-driving carTS. And there are thousands of accidents that happen every year as a result of bad drivers, but what about the person driving the shopping cart at your local grocery store? People’s heels and ankles are at great risk here, and thank God Walmart has stepped in to address the issue. They have applied for a patent on a self-driving grocery cart that has a little motor attached to it and can go anywhere on command. So instead of getting a cart yourself, you’ll in theory be able to use your smartphone to call a cart over to you. And once again, this is a prime example of robots taking our jobs, because if this works it would make those people who round up the carts in the parking totally useless. But imagine not having to return your cart, not having to push it through the aisles, just having it follow you wherever you go!

*Trigger warnings are dumb

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